Selling From The Heart Professionals Are Not Pretenders, What About You?

larry levine Jul 03, 2023
Selling From The Heart Professionals Are Not Pretenders, What About You?
“Wearing a mask wears you out. Faking it is fatiguing. The most exhausting activity is pretending to be what you know you aren’t.”
Rick Warren

Here's the mirror moment... Are you the real deal? Are you living your life as sales pretender?

According to Merriam-Webster, pretending can defined as...

  • To give a false appearance of being, possessing, or performing
  • To make believe
  • To claim, represent, or assert falsely

As kids growing up, playing make believe was fun, entertaining and playing dress up took us to places our minds could only imagine.

In today's highly educated business world, playing dress up in sales will only get you exposed as being just another sales rep. Here at Selling from the Heart, we call this being an empty suit (chapter 10 of Selling from the Heart)

Pretending to be someone you’re not can be an exhausting waste of all the incredible talents you alone have to offer your clients.

In a red ocean filled with sales sharks and empty suits, being genuine and heartfelt is a huge way to stand out. Being real, sincere, honest and not asserting yourself falsely will get you noticed.

Let's just face reality, your clients or for that matter, your future clients, can sniff out bull crap immediately. On the other hand, many know when you're "leaning in", bringing the business goods, the business substance or as we say here at Selling from the Heart, "giving a rip."

I believe being genuine in today's sales world is a rare quality.

Our world is full of sales phonies, social media hype and virtual fake sales personas. Who these people are portraying is not really who they are or are willing to admit too.

Why do so many in sales feel that "chest puffing" is a way to get noticed?

Would you agree your clients and future clients will respond favorably and will continually come back to you for more and more and more, when they see you as being the consummate sales professional?

Selling from the Heart professionals forge their own sales path and our not sales pretenders.

These professionals search for and discover their own unique way of pursuing their passions and purpose.

They forge an entirely new path to get to their desired destination.

It's about what they think and say that makes them who they are. It's what they do and how they view themselves within the sales world. They lead a congruent lifestyle.

These heartfelt professionals are guided by an internal compass. They don't follow the conventional or typical routes others take. They take the road less travelled.

They do not pretend to be someone they are not, just to fit in or make a sale.


"Forget about being impressive and commit to being real. Because being real is being impressive."
Jonathan Harnisch

Would you agree everyone is unique for a reason?

We all have our own paths.

To live life to your fullest potential, you must be true to yourself and stay true to yourself.

Being authentic, the real you, impacts your:

  • self-worth
  • relationship quality (think about your clients)
  • level of self-awareness
  • contentment and level of success

As you gain clarity about yourself, it makes it easier for you to attract the right people in your life.

Please reflect upon what I just mentioned and think about how this could impact your ability to attract the right kind of clients. Can clarity in yourself attract the right kind of clients? I believe it can.

That said, being genuine doesn’t just benefit you. It benefits others as well.

When you’re real with yourself, it frees you of the constraints and confinements of the inauthentic world.

In a business world full of emptiness, being real and transparent is nonnegotiable.

Transparency and being real:

  • Creates the foundational layers of trust
  • Creates the basis for a strong positive relationship where you can build loyalty
Without loyalty, you're a commodity

The legendary actress Judy Garland, once said,

"Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else."

Are you the first-rate version of yourself?

Are you bringing the real version of yourself to your clients and into the business community?

Being real... it's about intentionally baring your soul by showing the true version of yourself.

Why do I say this?

I believe we have an identity crisis occurring inside today's sales world. This crisis gets exposed even more due to the lack of trust and all the negativity surrounding salespeople.

Layer on top of all of this, the fear of rejection, the lack of self-confidence, a broken sales heart, the lack of fulfillment or simply trying to be someone they know they are not... and now you know why I believe there is an identity crisis.

Being phony is no way to fill your sales funnel

Phoniness is a human characteristic that can be sensed from miles away.

When you're looking to build your personal relationships, do you identify and relate to people who are honest, trustworthy and kind?

I believe you do, then I believe the same can be applied to your client relationships and interactions.

Is it fair to say, you would like to build and sustain real meaningful relationships?

This can only happen from being your genuine, authentic self.

There are people out there, think of your clients and future clients, who will accept you for who you are, flaws and all. However, you can’t find them until you are willing to accept yourself and let others see the real you.

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“Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”
Oscar Wilde

I would like for you to think for a moment...

Being true to yourself... means integrity, moral beliefs, personal values, honesty, sincerity, authenticity, living by what is and what is not acceptable to you, ethics, right and wrong, honor, no falsehood, truth... Now... how many of these words would others associate with the salespeople?

Therefore, those who absorb what it means to sell from the heart, live by a code of morals and values. 

Learn more about these values by downloading the Selling from the Heart Mainfesto.

Being true to yourself is fundamental to living a life full of integrity.

How many in sales have let their clients down by simply not living up to their promises?

I believe it's your duty to live up to your obligations and fulfill them, this becomes your character and your brand.

Stop pretending to be someone you are not just so you can fit into the so-called sales culture.

Think about what all of this might be costing you.

  • Accept your flaws
  • Learn to love yourself
  • Lean into self-improvement
  • Surround yourself with like-minded and like-hearted people

Staying true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it.


"What happens when people open their hearts? They get better."
Haruki Murakami

Vulnerability is a huge driving force of connection.

When you are willing to become vulnerable... now think about your client relationships and how important they are to you, you then open yourself up emotionally, allowing for a greater level of trust and understanding.

When you're willing to share personal experiences, thoughts, and feelings this can strengthen the bond between you and your clients.

By becoming a bit vulnerable, you demonstrate a willingness to let your guard down a bit and show your true self, which can encourage reciprocity and openness from others.

What you then start to create is an environment where people, your clients, feel safe to express their fears, insecurities, and struggles, knowing that they will be met with empathy and support.

I believe this is about being brave and tender. It’s nearly impossible to connect without it.

We live for it in our personal lives so what prevents us from doing this in our professional lives?

Why have we turned vulnerability into a sales weakness?

Why do we 'pretend' to make the sale, then revert to what every other empty suit does well... abandonment?

Without vulnerability relationships struggle. Without vulnerability how will your client relationships flourish?

Embrace vulnerability in your sales career.

While vulnerability can be a powerful force in deepening connections, it is not the sole driving force. Vulnerability works together with other factors such as shared values, effective communication, and mutual respect.

This is about opening yourself up to become closer to your clients. It’s about giving without expectation or a hidden agenda. It's receiving with an open heart.

This my sales friends is Selling from the Heart!


With encouragement, become more comfortable with who you are and be yourself. Exposing the real you to the business community might be scary, but I promise you it's worth it.

Pretending to be someone you’re not, is exhausting and a complete waste of all the talents you have to offer.

Staying true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it.

Stop letting others dictate how to lead your sales life

E.E. Cummings best said it,

"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." 

It is better to be yourself imperfectly, then it is to pretend to be something you are not perfectly.

To grow your sales, you must grow yourself. To grow yourself, you must get to know yourself.

Stop pretending and start doing!

Originally published on Larry Levine's LinkedIn.

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